Liew Seng Tat writes:

I woke up this afternoon and found blood stain on my bed sheet. I checked my mouth. I checked my nostrils. I checked my ass. I checked all over. Clearly the blood wasn't mine. I sat on my bed for good half and hour, trying to figure out what happened last night. I couldn't remember anything at all.

The English title for this film is called "With Friends Like These". I like this film. I miss my dog. I'm hungry. Wine is so cheap in Paris it's obscene not to drink them like water.

Winter is approaching. The days get dark quickly. I don't see much of daylight because I always sleep until late.

The colour of the wine stains my lips and teeth. I look so beautiful when I smile. Drinking with empty stomach fucks you up and that's exactly why I love it.

Maybe it's the weather or maybe it's too much alcohol, I've lost interest in the opposite sex. Lipsticks, perfumes, tits, hips and vaginas... they make me sick. They make me want to puke. I can live without any of them as long as I have my right hand. Wait a minute, that's not entirely true.

I do everything with my left hand coz I'm fucking left handed. Right hand is reserved for masturbation. Since I am now impotent, my right hand is pretty much useless. So anyone who needs an extra hand, I could lend you one.

The readers who masturbate to this also masturbate to:
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #001 - The cold
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #002 - Speaking French
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #003 - Cooking
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #004 - How To Kiss A Dutch Girl
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #005 - My right hand
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #006 - Dead Fish Girl
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #007 - Thessaloniki
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #008 - Jesus put me in so much shit
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #009 - My paintings
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #010 - Merry Fucking Christmas

DISCLAIMER!
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! aka I don't speak French is written by the filmmaker Liew Seng Tat during his stay in Paris. He is forced to write about his experience in Paris and update at least once a week. The characters and incidents described in JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! are always exaggerated, sometimes fictional and most of the time unpleasantly filthy. Please don't sue him.