Liew Seng Tat writes:

Bonjour...

I was burning Eiffel Tower, hoping to melt it down but instead I burnt my fingers. God damn this fucking lighter.

Sorry for not updating for the past two weeks. I was just a little upset over something. I couldn't write when I'm upset. When I don't write, there's nothing else to be done except drinking. When I'm drunk, I have hallucination, such as burning Eiffel Tower with a lighter.

Picture part 1: A Dutch girl I met in Amsterdam.

Here's how to kiss a Dutch girl

Jump as high as you could. Reach out your right hand to hold on to her body(probably the highest point you could grab is one of her breasts). Cling on to it like a mountain climber. While dangling, reach out your left hand and place it on her left shoulder. Do the same with your right hand. Once you have both hands on her shoulders, take a deep breath. Then try to move your hands up to her ears. Once you have a firm grasp on both her ears, force yourself upward until you meet her face. Voila!

*It's best to wear a harness equipped with extra steel cables for safety purpose.

Picture part 2: Dutch girls are so tall I have to split this picture into two. Dutch girls are so tall even giraffes feel threaten.

I should be working on my screenplay but I'm writing this nonsense instead.
I should be checking out girls but I rather check out their dogs that they are walking.
I should be learning my French but I stare at my teacher's breasts instead.
I should be eating properly but I drink alcohol instead.
I should be out walking in this beautiful autumn's day but I locked myself in the room instead.

Mui, I think I'm depressed.

The readers who read this also read:
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #001 - The cold
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #002 - Speaking French
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #003 - Cooking
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #004 - How To Kiss A Dutch Girl
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #005 - My right hand
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #006 - Dead Fish Girl
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #007 - Thessaloniki
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #008 - Jesus put me in so much shit
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #009 - My paintings
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! post #010 - Merry Fucking Christmas

DISCLAIMER!
JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! aka I don't speak French is written by the filmmaker Liew Seng Tat during his stay in Paris. He is forced to write about his experience in Paris and update at least once a week. The characters and incidents described in JE NE PARLE PAS FRANCAIS! are always exaggerated, sometimes fictional and most of the time unpleasantly filthy. Please don't sue him.